I thought I should share my first experience with a much younger man. It might give you some perspective on both the positives and the negatives. And yes, despite the negatives I did not make it my last.
I had a normal match.com account to which a very young man responded. I got the email on one of those days where the world was bleak and I suddenly wanted to throw caution into the wind. I find that although I get many inquiries, I'm really somewhat of a hard catch. I love my solitude and my own company and it takes a lot to get me out of my shell. Don't get me wrong, my co-workers, employees and friends will tell you I'm the life of the party. But when it comes to dating I'm very careful and at the time could take it or leave it. Work was so all consuming that quiet times were a welcome retreat. But sometimes you just feel spunky or adventurous, and when I feel adventurous - watch out. So I met this young man. I'm embarrassed to say he was a mere 24 years old, worked for the airlines and was just so so hot to meet me. We met at a local sports bar. Lots of people, always trying to be safe, I ventured inside and he spotted me almost immediately. To say he was feeling amorous is quite an understatement. He had real trouble keeping his hands to himself, and I'll admit I was flattered. It was nice to feel that attractive and desired. I will also grant that we probably didn't have much in common. His level of sophistication was very low and honestly there would not have been much hope for improving it anytime soon . Oh well! What he lacked in sophistication he tried to make up in enthusiasm. His confession, months later -that he was the most envied man at his workplace, is probably accurate. He apparently conveyed his experiences in detail to his co-workers much to their delight. Frankly, he was energetic and wanted to prove he was worthy. He literally would call me and beg, "please let me come over again, I promise I'll try to keep up this time".
Sure - it didn't last long, but it was a learning experience for myself and obviously for him. I ask myself frequently why God would design us in such a way to make a woman her best after 40 and men their best at 18. It sounds like a cosmic joke. Be it as it may, that's reality and we have to come to terms with it - each in our own way. I've learned a lot since that first experience. Primarily that you can find true quality experiences with a younger man that transcend the more obvious advantages.
I have, however, found a lot of other pitfalls that I want to warn you about. The primary ones are as follows: The stalker, the Conman and the younger man at work. I haven't had experience with the latter one because it violates one of my golden rules, but I have enough third pary stories to curl your toes,
I've only had one "cougar cub" and he was 12 years younger than me. That was over a decade ago and I've since married someone 5 years older than me. I think cougar relationships are great for short term relationships--because Isabella is right when she describes the pitfalls--and they are universal!
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